November 07, 2002 at 10:40 pm
If you are discovering this diary and are one of my friends, my family members, an acquaintance, my classmates, my co-workers, someone who thinks they know me, or even someone who knows they know me, you should be warned/briefed about a few things before proceeding to read my diary.
[1] This is MY diary. It does exist on the internet and I know that anyone can find it. It is still my diary and because this is the case, it is the thing I use to record my unedited thoughts. I rant about discussions, thoughts and behaviours. I talk about my social and political beliefs. I talk about my theories, my feelings, my ideas, and my opinions. This, unfortunately for everyone else, includes the people I know and the places I go.
I've been known to feel negatively toward all of it sometimes. Sometimes, I rant about my family. Sometimes I bash on my friends. Sometimes I trash my enemies. Sometimes I growl about my acquaintances. Sometimes I rip myself to shreds.
I recognize that you don't know me, don't know why, when, or how you got here reading this but you are now my captive slave for this short portion of time. For all of the trashing, please take note that when I direct negative thoughts towards friends, family, and acquaintances, it is unserious. It is how I get out my anger/frustration/anxiety over the big and little things that happen to me during any day of my life, out of my system. This makes writing healthy in my opinion and helps, really only me, which is a diary's sole purpose.
[2] Sometimes, I can be very angry and despondent. Many of the entries I write about myself are written to help me get through my negative feelings. I have found that there is no better release for me then writing blindly, especially about feelings of anger and sadness.
Please, if reading an entry I write about some famous author's description of life's nothingness, do not think that it means I am thinking about going through with something drastic. If I am contemplating unhealthy behaviour or any other drastic and/or life-threatening thing, I promise you that I will be quite frank about it. Come on, that is the reason I am here writing in the first place. I don't want to be another coward giving up on my self and ending up ending everything. Deciding to take my life would be the last thing I would ever do.
[3] If you know me personally and happen to stumble across one of these entries, do not e-mail or call asking if I am talking about you. Do not accuse me of talking about you. Know that if I have a problem with you and I write about it here, I will call you by name or a nickname that both you and I have used for some time on a personal level.
I am not afraid of confronting people with my feelings and if I am talking about you it is very likely that I will talk to you about it one on one. I will not write about you using symbols, metaphors, or by referring to you as a collective or group of people. I deserve more credit than that.
[4] On a final note, if you are someone who knows me in real life and you happen to stumble across this diary, especially if you read something that is unsettling to you, please tell me about it, so that we may discuss it. If you prefer that I change your name for sake of the entries, let me know about it.
If you read something I've written about you and you would like me to remove it, tell me about it. However, I would hope that you would have a good reason why I should, and you should also tell me about that. I can promise my fairness.
Having said all of this, proceed with caution. If you think you might not want to read something I may or may not have written about an opinion, behaviour, idea, or you, then simply do not read my diary. If you continue even though I have blatantly laid down a disclaimer and are ignoring my warnings, and read something you don't like, it is not my fault.
By having laid out this disclaimer, I hereby relieve myself of all anger, embarrassment, trauma, sadness, legal action, nausea, cramps, diarrhea and/or any other negative feeling experienced by anyone reading this diary. I would also like to add that not everything I talk about is negative and shouldn't be taken in such manner.